Easy Peasy

On August 1st, 1992, I married Sheryl Vanderbosch. As of today, if you are reading this on August 1st, she had gone by the name of Sheryl Hauger for 31 years. Typically, I would make self-deprecating comments in my attempt to be funny, but, not today. I will still try to write funny things, but self-deprecating humor is a way to put focus on myself. This is my website, my blog, my writings, my thoughts, and my opinions about music and the impact it makes on me, so I receive enough attention as it is.

My wife, Sheryl, is amazing. I am not going to list all of her positives and the things I love about her. That is personal and I make sure I tell her that I love her and everything about her on a daily basis. Instead of noting all of those things, I will simply say that she is the most loving, forgiving, and incredible wife, friend, and Christian woman in my life. I mean that sincerely. Even when I was stupid and pretty much screwed everything up. She is a pro when it comes to being incredible.

I will talk about two lessons she has taught me. If we have talked face to face you will have heard me talk about the lessons or I may have even mentioned them in a previous blog.

The lessons are how to say, “Thank you” and “You are welcome”.

Too many times when we see the word lessons we translate that to something learned or an accomplishment.

“I hope they learned their lesson.”

“I sure learned my lesson.”

When people use the word lesson(s), they fail to use it correctly. The word lesson(s) is the process or a process to accomplish a task and not an end result. I have no idea if that is the accepted definition of the word. I didn’t look it up, but, it will be the definition for this writing.

Don’t confuse the word lesson(s) with the word practice.

A person practices their lessons in order to achieve the end result.

Doesn’t that make sense?

It does to me.

I have been thinking a lot lately about learning and the process of learning. How do we learn, how do we achieve an end result of what we have learned, and how do we apply what we learned? Processes have always intrigued me. It is almost therapeutic for me to break a task down into individual steps.

For example, I enjoy instructing new flute and clarinet players in the correct way to assemble their instruments. I have thought about the steps in the assembly (The lesson) and taught the students the correct procedure of instrument assembly. The students are then instructed in the correct way to disassemble the instruments (continuance of the lesson) and they are taught how to safely secure the instruments in their cases.

The students are encouraged to open the cases, assemble the instruments, disassemble the instruments, then secure them in the cases. They are instructed to repeat the entire lesson multiple times (Practice) until they can complete the task correctly (The end result).

As musicians, we practice our lessons in order to achieve an end result. We do not perform the end result in order to learn our lessons, do we? Not at all. That would be putting the cart before the horse.

However, we as a society, in general, enjoy receiving fast results.

When we send a text, we expect the person that received the text to reply instantly.

When we go to a fast food restaurant, we go through the drive-thru because we want our food as quickly as possible. (Pssst. I will almost always go inside the restaurant to order. Many times is it a lot quicker. By the way, you can look disdainfully at the people in cars you had walked by when you entered that still have not made it to the speaker to order)

When we order an item online, we expect it to be delivered within a day or two.

When we start up our computers, we expect to be able to surf the web as soon as we log in. No more “EEEEE AAAAAHHHH RRRRRRRRRRR” sounds of the modem connecting to the internet for us.

When we get a new piece of music, we expect to be able to perform it within a few days.

We will stop here for a few minutes and catch our breath.

Some may be laughing so hard they can’t catch their breath or some may be gasping because of my last statement about performing music within a few days.

In for four through your nose and out for sixteen through your mouth. That’s it, easy breathing now.

Even though we live in a world that strives for instant gratification, we cannot expect the same from the musical world.

I am just as guilty as the next musician when I know people can hear me practicing. I will play through things I know I can play well so they will think I am a good player.

If I had been taken to music court and received sentencing for the times I have refrained from practicing difficult passages in order to keep from sounding bad, I would have been found guilty. My sentencing, while in high school, would have been life in musical prison. Through college, I probably would have had to serve 10-15 years. As an adult, in early adulthood, I would have had to serve 1-3 years with reduced time for good behavior. In my life now, I may receive a warning or a ticket at most.

My infractions have reduced because I understand the power of practicing lessons in order to achieve the end result of being performance ready.

Briefly, I will outline the way I practice. I practice the difficult passages slowly, over and over until I can play the passages at speed. During the practicing of particular passages, I will include surrounding measures of the extraordinary excerpts so that the notorious notes blend into the penultimate practiced phrase.

By starting slowly and working my way up to speed, I have found that I can vary my practice sessions by including more lessons. For example, I can introduce and incorporate different flexibility and range-building exercises. I may practice easier pieces at a quicker tempo so that I could incorporate double or triple tonguing.

Practicing notes, phrases, and passages that are not, Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy and are more Difficult Difficult Lemon Difficult, you, as a musician will be helping yourself in the long run.

The sequence to becoming successful is pretty simple.

When you practice the correct way, you become a better musician.

When you become a better musician, you get to perform with better musicians.

When you perform with better musicians, you get to play better music.

If you play better music, you have more fun.

If you have fun, you want to practice more.

If you practice more, you become a better musician.

(Yup, I stole that sequence and I have no idea who gets the credit. But, at least I am acknowledging that I stole it)

Now that we know the differences between lessons, practice, and performance-ready, we can return to the two lessons I have learned from Sheryl. Thank you and You are welcome.

I have always had a difficult time saying thank you and you are welcome at the correct times.

Don’t get me wrong, saying thank you has always been a part of my speech and I am sincere when I express my gratitude. What I mean is, I do not say thank you at the appropriate times when someone compliments me about a solo that I played or other melodious sounds I had produced through the trumpet.

“Great solo, Dan!”

“Aw, I kind of wavered on the high D and barely squeaked out the G above it.”

That was the type of response I would give before Sheryl consciously corrected the consistent correspondence of my cornet concerto concerts. (I do not have a cornet, however, I would love to have one, but it was the appropriate word to use in my alliterative phrase)

I have gotten a lot better with how I receive compliments. I no longer use self-deprecating phrases in my attempt to hide my awkwardness in receiving a compliment. Plus it really is used a lot of times to try and squeeze out more praise in order to fuel the ego.

Now, the conversation would sound something like this.

“Great solo, Dan!”

“Thank you, it was a fun piece to play!”

You are welcome goes hand in hand with the ability to graciously say, thank you.

“Ah, Dan. Thank you so much for sitting in with us with such short notice!”

“You are welcome. Thank you for the call and I hope you call me again.”

Taa Daaa!!!! Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezy.

I believe the concepts of saying, thank you and you are welcome, as well as learning what lessons are and how to practice in order to become concert ready, should be taught to the young musician at the same time as learning how to play their instrument.

As a matter of fact, I will be practicing what I preach.

On August 10, 2023, I will be meeting band students at Desoto Middle School in Arcadia, Florida as their band director. I will give them lessons to practice so that they will become musicians, independent thinkers and problem solvers, and leaders. They will learn how to apply the concepts of saying thank you and you are welcome when people attend their concerts and applaud.

I will not be easy peasy with them. I am more of the difficult difficult lemon difficult when it comes to the beginning part of learning something new. Once you learn how to do something the correct way when starting out, it will then transition from difficult difficult to easy peasy.

I look forward to teaching the students proper technique, sound, reading, stage presence, and performance.

I look forward to seeing the parents holding up their cell phones, recording their kids making music in a band.

I look forward to watching the kids grow into musicians with poise and strength.

I was looking forward to my retirement. I wanted to play my trumpet, do woodworking projects, and fix my lawn so that it looks like a tropical paradise instead of a dessert.

But, helping the Desoto High School Band program, made me realize that the incoming students needed someone that would prepare them for the high school band and teach them lessons for life through music. As high school band members, they would no longer spend the first week of band class learning how to read music.

I had to put up or shut up. Since I really enjoy telling stories and talking, there was no way I was going to shut up.

It may have taken me 31 years to learn how to graciously say thank you and you are welcome, but, it will only take me one lesson to teach it. It will be up to the students to practice the lessons so they will be performance ready for life.